Taco Time Continued.

Alright, time to finish up the last of the tacos.

Right now I'm working on my Bacon Jalapeno Taco. I've got Cliff helping me out by making sure any scrap of food dropped gets engulfed immediately. And I've got Pandora rocking my Cheeseburger station. Yeah, that's the name of the band--good garage punk band. You've probably heard them during the credits of "Step Brothers", one of my favorite movies.

I've got my queso done and the bacon just got crispy. I like my tacos extra-healthy, that's why I make them out of bacon, batter-fried jalapenos, queso, and cream cheese. Just so you know, the cream cheese is 1/3 Less Fat, so I don't have to go to the gym today.

The bacon is from the farm in Nebraska and it's some of the best. The queso dip recipe was handed down to me from generations of Todds before me. It is the following:

1 can of Rotel

Several chunks of Velveeta

Name one person that doesn't like that queso recipe! If you don't, you're either lying or you're a communist.

The batter for the jalapenos is simple: Flour, salt, cornmeal, cayenne, and beer (in this instance, Oskar Blues G'Knight--an Imperial Red and freakin' good). I'm not going to fuck with a dredging station--just a simple, spicy batter. Oil hits around 350 or so (just test it by plopping a drip of batter in it), then dump the jalapenos in. Only takes a minute or so. Take 'em out and drain on a paper towel.

Spread on the cream cheese, add peppers, cover with fancy queso, stack on a little bacon, and you're good to go. I pulled the bacon apart into bite-sized pieces--one, because it's easier to eat and the full strip of bacon you put in there doesn't come out in one big piece...and two, because I just had a crown installed and I needed my bacon a little more manageable. Don't want another trip to the dentist....although her name is Dr. Brandi Bottoms, and she's hot and wears leather boots. No shit.

Sorry the last two pics suck. My expensive camera decided to not focus at all and my camera-phone is on it's last leg.

How was the taco, you ask? Unbelievable. If had my own taco stand/truck/cart/restaurant, I would definitely include this on the board. I'm actually going to have another one. One second, please..........

Here's a little bit better picture. Dumbass camera decided to focus on one pic, but that's it. Click the picture, zoom in and see what we're working with here. Nothing but goodness. How many meals can you make out of bacon, deep fried jalapenos, beer, cream cheese, and Rotel dip? Not many, my friend. Not many.

Okay, now for the Clam Po' Boy. I've never made a remoulade sauce, but it looks fairly similar to the Action Sauce that I make for my fish tacos. Just subtract the citrusy stuff and add deep, spicy flavors.

Here's what I came up with:

1/4 cup mayo

1/4 cup Fage

1 tspn Dijon

1 tspn pickle juice

1/2 tspn jalapeno juice

1/2 tspn Worcestershire

1 1/2 tspn horseradish

1 tspn garlic salt

It's pretty f-ing good, if I do say so myself. I'd drink this through a straw. Here goes the Clam Po' Boy attempt.

I'm not going to lie...aside from the tasty remoulade sauce, this taco kind of sucked. It certainly didn't win any style points, hence my reasoning for not posting any pics of it. Visualize this: a tortilla with several chunks of fried clam meat and sauce poured over it. Nothing fancy, mainly because I wanted to get the gist of the taco without overloading it with condiments. Although a little shredded lettuce and some thin-sliced tomato would have helped, I not sure it would have saved it.

Possibly using oysters instead of clams would have helped a little, but I'm thinking it just wasn't meant to be. I'm sure I'm pretty fried-out right now, too, after eating all those jalapenos and bacon.

At any rate, we succeeded with most of our recipes. And it was a fun experiment. If I ever decide to open a taco wagon, I've got a good start on my menu.

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